Now watch this here! 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8PqI12R8YNU

I woke up this morning and panicked. 

Because it seemed that in the 3 hours of sleep that I had, my left eye had managed to become blind-er!! And no matter how hard I rubbed, or how many tears I shed, it just refused to clear!

And then, I sat down, at 6am in the morning, to finish the work I couldn't complete the night before. 

Tired, sleepy, cranky, and yeah, half-blind. And then 3 hours later, I go to school and realise that it was all in vain. 

I cannot tolerate irresponsibility. Maybe it's because I stand too much by my ideals. Responsibility for one's words, actions duties. 

Whatever I'm doing now feels like such an insult to my left-brain. I can feel its restlessness every time I get a new project, I can feel it relishing every opportunity to tackle difficult texts, but nothing is ever enough to feed its insatiable hunger. Hahah. Can't believe that I'm actually craving for math problems so much that I'd purposely incorporate mathematical formulae in my work. 

But, that is not to say that I don't like what I do. I believe in what I do, although, a lot of times, it feels like I'm doing crap. And worst still when people don't do as they're expected to, especially when you're depending on them. High expectations don't work with people whose efficiency levels are stagnant at a negative 100%. 

 

It seems very likely that my 2009 resolution would go unresolved.  

Now, stay tuned as I slap the living daylights out of some people.... 

and oh yeah.. try to wrestle my mac from Yaya's small insistent hands. 

See the little devil hijacking my photo booth.  

And I was still a teenager thennn! Hahah, damn, I hate growing old. 

My resolution this year was to be kind to everyone, and to be more than civil to people I hate. 

And to stop judging people by their appearance. (Although there is a saying that goes that "The clothes maketh the man" )

Unfortunately, "kind" has many different definitions and I regret to say that although it's just been 3 days into my twenty-hood, I already feel like kicking someone's head off and smashing it like a ripe juicy watermelon thrown out the kitchen window. 

Ohman, how happy that imagery makes me feel, you have no idea. 

Is it unkind of me to imagine such violent acts in my head and relishing every thought of it? 

I've never encountered anyone like this since primary school, and plus, I thought people outgrew this kind of behaviour at the age of 12. Maybe this happens to be an anomaly, because in this case, physical maturity is somehow not accompanied by emotional maturity. 

Or maybe superficiality is the new trend of the day.

 I cannot understand how some people want to be respected without first respecting others. Whatever happened to "do unto others what you want others to do unto you" ? I believe that phrase is in the bible. So I guess, I'm being kind when I repay disrespect with disrespect since that happens to be what the other person wants. Hahah. Wait, Actually, I'm above that, it's way more honorable to pretend someone doesn't exist. 

I really have to kick ass this semester, since I can't whack someone's face in like a "whack the bunny" game in the arcade. And for the love of my life, I shall not complain publicly about my grades lest I end up as the bunny. 

Grrr. I aimed to eradicate negativity and find a spiritual balance this year. But, hahah, seems like the scale has plunged dangerously hell-wards. 

But anyway, I still have 358 days to better myself.  

Wish me luck!