I . am . pissed . with . Topshop .
What is wrong with brainless people working the counters these days?
As though it isn't embarassing enough that the one time I buy lingerie in topshop and a guy (and not too bad-looking, at that) keyed it in, they made me pay freaking $9 more for a pair I did not get!
He scanned the barcode twice! And made me pay twice the price for one pair!
Probably his first time scanning barcodes on knickers but seriously, who does something as stupid as that?
Yeah, fine, I was equally as stupid; I didn't check the receipt before leaving the store.
But I trusted them! (Hah-hah! Now that's irony for you)
Hmm. Ohwell. People do stupid things all the time, and it's not the first time this happened to me. (:
So.. from now on, my latest NY resolution is to read the receipts whenever I make a purchase!
What is wrong with me?? My mum has taught me to do that since I was old enough to read! -.-
God, $9 is probably nothing at some other time, but at this point, if I had just $9 more, I wouldn't have had to resort to extorting money from my grandmother.
Oh all right, all you self-righteous people tut-tutting away..
I only got money from her because she made me go grocery shopping again, which by the way, is somewhere among the top ten things I love to do. (:
So's fair, she gives me money for groceries and I get to keep the change; a win-win situation for me, I must add.
I have decided that France is gonna have to wait one more year for me.
Call it a mule-headed impulse but I called Fadila and told her, amidst all the uncertainty I'm feeling, I would have to wait until the results are out to believe that I deserve the opportunity.
Of course, not in those exact words, but she got the message.
I still have to work on my C1 (which I flunked miserably, much to the delight of the anal-retentive receptionist at AF. ) And also, maybe I could finally get some things together for the long overdue portfolio so I can achieve my dreams.
Meanwhile, I still have the other proficiency test, which I am determined not to fail. (Although I doubt the AR receptionist would find out if I did)
I can't remember where I heard but someone told me As are coming out mid-feb; but hey, it could be a dream, too.
I can't wait for CNY. And next wednesday seems so far away... ):
>2:17 PM
One of the kids had an argument with me regarding the meaning of attend and entertain.
She was so adamant that "a waiter entertains the customers" and refused to see reason.
I was telling her the word is attend. As in, "Please hold and we will attend to you shortly".
Seriously, if she had ever called CGH appointment hotline or even any Taxi booking hotline she would know in a sec what attend really means.
She kept saying attend is only used for phrases such as "attend school".
And how exactly do you explain to a nine-year old that clowns entertain and waiters attend.
God, sometimes these kids try my patience. They ask you, what does tease mean? And the only word that comes to mind is 'suan'. Damn. I should start memorising the damned dictionary.
And when I take a second too long to answer, they'll go, "Teacher! You also don't know?!" in mock outrage.
Seriously, how the hell do they think I get through A levels if I don't know how to do a simple thing like that?
And yet, despite the incessant headaches I get because of their screaming.. I can't find it within me to scold them and feel good about it.
My mum asked me once, "Why wouldn't you consider a career in teaching?"
I never hesitated to give her a look of pure horror and disbelief. In my experience as a student, I've pissed off a good number of teachers, made my fair share of hell for them and all this, despite having a squeaky clean record that says "Khadija is a polite and reserved girl."
Every year, my mum didn't even have to look at the report book to see what the teacher wrote because, 99.99% of the time, it's the same `ol thing.
And maaaan, if I were my own teachers the past year, I would've killed me.
I remember a certain teacher of mine had phases that I liked to observe. Sometimes, he'd be so nice to me, it makes me feel so guilty for everything. And then, there's the phase where he gives up on me, and looks through me in class, and doesn't even bother to ask me to answer questions even though he called on everyone else. He doesn't know but I usually work harder when he's ignoring my existence. ;) Easier to work without someone watching you like a hawk and pointing out every single mistake you made in taking notes throughout the lesson. He was gracious about it and never made a big deal out of horrendous grammar mistakes, but still.
Or a certain teacher who came down too harsh on me, and literally almost caused me to cry. Which, honestly speaking, is something I'd never do in front of anyone, but he came really close to it. Okay, I couldn't really blame him because I confess that it was PMS (and the fact that I hated the subject) and plus, he felt bad about it after, I can tell. (: And never gave me a mean or sarcastic comment ever since. And towards the end, he was really quite nice to me, even giving advice about the next leg of my education.
Given the hell my teachers had to go through with me the past year... I think I'll pass.
Teaching is not as easy as it seems and I don't think I'm cut out for it.
My grandfather was a respected Malay Lecturer in a now-defunct Malay school and he was even famous in his own right. And my uncle is currently a Malay teacher, and was even part of the team who wrote the new Malay textbooks for Secondary schools (which in my opinion, is totally lousy). So I can pretty much say that teaching is somewhat in the blood, if not heart.
But a crude generalisation of what I can observe from the teachers I know personally are the shallow lives they lead. Their lives are confined within the 4 walls of the classroom. When they reach home, they talk about school and how their students were being such asses. When they go out with friends, they can't help talking about the same things! I know there are people who really love being able to mould the future and all. But my mind is so excited to explore the rest of the world that I know if I were to teach for the rest of my life, I will cripple it.
I have a burning desire to fly the open skies, and I don't think I can do that in a classroom.
To everyone whose passion is teaching; (like my dear Christine), I say go ahead, you'll do great, I just know you will. (:
And to my mother, (who happens to hate teachers despite working in a school) don't worry, while I may take up moulding in the future, moulding the future is not for me.
>1:29 PM
Pardon me for being so exceptionally lazy and just CTRL+C and CTRL+Ving the class blog skin, but heheh, at times, the instant noodles taste so much nicer than the properly cooked one, getwhutImean?
Anyway, I'm too lazy to update it in my links page so if you're itching with curiosity, here it is,
Sorry, wrong add.
This is it;
http://www.ohsixfourteen.blogspot.com
Hardly any creativity in the URL, eh?
But of course, y'know, sometimes, for lack of rain, a river can run dry, getwhutImean?
(:
You know sometimes when you just drift apart from someone who used to be a very close friend? How do you tell if you're supposed to salvage that friendship or just, for lack of rain, let it dry?
What if you actually welcome the drift, because deep down you know, it just simply cannot work out and you're just too sick of pretending? Does that make you a bad person because you've been pretending all this while?
Sometimes I feel like I'm on stage and need desperately to hold myself together so I won't screw up the play of my life. To remember which lines I'm supposed to laugh at, to remember when I'm supposed to smile.
But the thing is, one shouldn't need to pretend in front of a friend, yes?
I guess that's why I need coffee with Christine desperately sometimes. It feels like a take five where the actors get to rest with their masks off backstage. And then it's back to the world of Lights... Camera... Action!
As she said, sometimes, hypocrisy is your only lifeline in this dog-eat-dog world. You don't need to lie to everybody but you don't need to tell everyone the truth either. As cliche as it sounds, so long as you know where to draw the line, and to not lie to yourself, I guess we're all on the safe side of the world.
Another question I've always had is this; How to stop people being Idealistic?
The world needs more than a miracle to rid itself of idealism indefinitely but how does one purge another of idealistic thoughts that are potentially toxic to the human population?
More importantly, how can one rid the nation of idealistic and potentially self-destructing politicians who keep their ideals closeted under lock and key?
I will not name names nor refer to specific events for fear of the ISA. But no worries, even if you do manage to crack the encrypted code message, (and I'm talking to you, the civil serving babysitter, looking after the big and dangerous world wide web) it's not about you big honchos up there so, we're at peace, right?
So where was I?
Yes, idealists. I fear the big govt guys who straightaway got corn fields without planting any kernels.
For example, if a person was to be born a boy, and grew up to be a man, (assuming there's no hankypanky there) , would he ever understand what it is like to be a woman? Of course, no one said he could not try. He could turn out to be a gynae specialised in uh, the woman's anatomy, but the main thing is, he wouldn't feel what a woman feels. He wouldn't experience what a woman does, no matter how many times he's observed them. Therefore, is it not right to say that he wouldnt think like how a woman thinks?
Applying the same scenario, if a person was to be born rich, with all his needs, wants and wishes fulfilled, would he understand the plights of the less fortunate? To him money may be a matter of a question posed to a parent, or perhaps, a simple call to the personal banker. He wouldnot be able to understand that to some people, money means a whole day in the sun with their backs bent double and heavy loads on their backs.
When it comes to retirement age, the white collared worker who has been spending most of his working life in an airconditioned office, venturing little into the golden sunshine, would still, be relatively healthy, not having had a life filled with hard labour. While the labourer would most definitely have sun-darkened skin, weathered hands, wiry limbs.
Does it not feel like a slap to the face if the airconditioned guy walks up to the sundarkened guy at the end of a forty year career for both and say, "I understand how you feel, but perhaps, we should increase the retirement age a little since we're still healthy and strong."
A forty year stint in relative comfort of an airconditioned office compared to forty years toiling under the sun... but of course, "I understand how you feel" he says.
Well, I've only got this to say; just because one person can continue working till they nail his coffin shut, does not necessarily mean the whole world can.
Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions -
it only guarantees equality of opportunity.
--Irving Kristol--
As I said, forty years for the big guy is the same as forty years for the little guy, but what they become at the end of it.. no sane person can call that equality.
Libellés : class blog, equality
>12:37 AM
The big grey cloud spewing lightning and crying thunder and squeezing big fat raindrops over my head seems to be here again.
Maybe I can't help feeling moody because the hormones are raging again but sometimes, I wish I had a never-ending supply of sleeping pills.
Answer me this, does a painkiller cure heartaches?
No, actually, I already know that answer. (:
But wouldn't it be wonderful if there was a pill to cure emotions? Like, an angry pill, to pop when you want to be angry. Or a happy pill? As far as I know a happy pill is the only one that exists, but is unfortunately an illegal drug. (think: ecstacy) Maybe tranquilizers when you want to feel calm exists as well. But do you get what I mean? To a large extent, pill popping does not really give an answer for everything. While I happen to think painkillers are nothing short of miraculous, they still stop significantly short of curing a simple thing as heartaches, which of course, are nothing a tub of ben&jerry's can't cure.
But I've finished 2 tubs of Ben&Jerry's now, (not in one sitting, don't worry) and I don't feel cured! Maybe 3 tubs ought to do the trick! (:
So people, I'm open to suggestions, what cures heartaches? (:
I know praying does but read the first para again, get the hint?
Horror movies should help.
Body#19, here I come!
>2:38 PM
Okay, enough panic and self-induced heartache!
The stupid laptop was playing a mean joke on me.
For days, it refused to even blink! But thankgod, today it's fine. (:
Some of you out there may have heard. That YES! I managed to get blue highlights! After much consideration. The mother was freaked out bad and kept frowning whenever she glanced at me. And she even bothered to say that I am banned from colouring my hair again.. Like, whaaat?
It's not like I'm going to care what she says, because as far as I know, there is nothing wrong with dying your hair, at least, in the religious point of view and I'm really quite sick of her trying to control every single element of my life.
The last I checked, the hair was attached to my head. Hmm, lemme check again...
Yep, I thought as much; my head.
Maybe being at home too long has turned me into an angsty teenager; if I can still call myself that, at least. But it's not fair, you see, the sisters all work and use it as an excuse to come home really late; most of the time past midnight. While I don't mind being stuck at home all the time, people seem to think that just because I'm home, it means I don't have anything better to do. GOSH. I don't mind the housework so much but it grates on the nerves to have people decide what you're supposed to be doing the next day.
They'll go, "Oh, tomorrow, do this, since you're not working"
or "Tomorrow, don't forget to sweep the floor, since you've got nothing to do"
If not because of the money, I think, I'll get a job just to shut them up.
Yeah, sure, the house will be a mess but I don't think I'll care too much since I won't be at home to listen to the mother nag about it.
Grrrr.
>1:05 PM
Age is just a number.
yeah, right .
I feel horribly snappy and moody when the new year starts and that's just because I'll be adding one to my age. Heck, I'm not done being eighteen!
Maybe all the hype about celebrating birthdays is just to take the sting out of growing older, because otherwise, it's really no big deal and just another opportunity to ask for things you won't usually get. (:
Anyway, the beloved (*coughcough*) elder sister got me a beautiful silver ipod nano! (: 
I'm ridden with guilt, but uh, my instinct tells me I should keep the mouth shut. (:
It was really sweet of the classmates (or rather ex-classmates) to turn up for the dinner. And gosh, KF was being irritating, I should have kicked his head off.
Anyway, long story cut short, I cannot blow out a candle on top of a cake placed on the table when I am standing on the chair. GRR. Unless the others don't mind me half-spitting into the cake... Heheh. (:
Happy Birthday to me, hoohaa! (:
>9:42 AM